Falcons vs. Texans: Who was the defensive player of the game?

For those who were unaware, the Falcons defense did make the trip to Houston on Sunday. Unfortunately, the majority of them were still asleep by the time 4PM rolled around, which largely explains what happened in Texas that day. I tried desperately to find some bright spots here, but as I stared into the void, all I saw was a sad, broken man staring back. He told me life doesn’t have to be this way. I laughed, took a shot of vodka, and started writing this instead. Enjoy!

Grady Jarrett

Houston had given up the second most QB hits in the league prior to Sunday. The Falcons came in ranking in the top-10 in QB pass rush win percentage. So of course the rest of the defensive line crapped the bed. Except Jarrett. He was the only one generating pressure and getting into the backfield consistently. Whatever coach takes over this team in 2020 is going to love this player.

The Clock

If, like me, you stared into that abyss of a game and wondered “Does life really have to be this hard” as you drank your fifth sixth seventh eighteenth shot of vodka, you probably noticed that time kept moving. Those hands on the analog clock (who still uses those?) kept ticking away. Even as the Falcons kept trying to delay the inevitable, those hands on the clock reminded us that we weren’t stuck in the endless void. There would be an end to this misery. And it finally came. Tick tock, your team sucks.

Dan Quinn

If there was any doubt that Quinn would be fired this year, this game probably put it to rest. I like you Dan. I wish you the best. Thanks for coaching a craptacular defensive effort that will end in your termination.

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