I'm running on like 4 hours of sleep, so sarcasm incoming.
I hear you want to go to training camp! So do I, but I live too far away and work two jobs. But if you're rich, lazy, or find yourself unable to sleep, there's a thing going on for the next two weeks that might pique your interest in good old Flowery Branch, GA.
Here's the rundown of hopefully everything you'll need to know for the coming weeks.
Training camp is located right here. No really, click on that.
In case you can't click on that (And how could you read this and not click on that link at this point in the technological age?) here's the address:
Training camp runs from today (July 25 if you're like me and don't know what day it is 75% of the time) until Tuesday, August 12th. Most of the practices start at 3:30 (including today's!) but there are a couple that don't. Here's the full thing:
Friday, July 25: 3:30-5:50 p.m. (open to the public)
Saturday, July 26: 3:30-5:50 p.m. (open to the public)
Sunday, July 27: 3:30-6:05 p.m. (open to the public)
Monday, July 28: 3:30-6:05 p.m. (open to the public)
Tuesday, July 29: 3:30-6:05 p.m. (open to the public)
Wednesday, July 30: Players' day off, no practice
Thursday, July 31: 3:30-6:05 p.m. (open to the public)
Friday, August 1: KIA Motors "Friday Night Lights" at Archer High School in Lawrenceville, GA, 6:45-9:10 p.m.
Saturday, August 2: 3:30-5:30 p.m. (open to the public)
Sunday, August 3: 3:30-6:05 p.m. (open to the public)
Monday, August 4: 3-5:30 p.m. (Combined practice with Tennessee Titans, open to the public)
Tuesday, August 5: Players' day off, no practice
Wednesday, August 6: 3:30-6:05 p.m. (open to the public)
Thursday, August 7: Practice closed to the public
Friday, August 8: Falcons vs. Dolphins, 7 p.m., Georgia Dome
Saturday, August 9: 4:30-5:45 p.m. (open to the public)
Sunday, August 10: Players' day off, no practice
Monday, August 11: 3:30-5:50 p.m. (open to the public)
Tuesday, August 12: 10 a.m.-12:35 p.m. (open to the public)
There are three days during that span where practice is either closed or not open to the public. Those would be...
Wednesday, July 30
Tuesday, August 5
Sunday, August 10
So if you show up to Flowery Branch on those days, you're under arrest.
If for some reason you haven't purchased the latest teleportation technology, chances are you'll need to step into a conveniently placed engine with four tires and will it to your destination. Thankfully, the Falcons have foreseen this incredible advancement in engineering and have ensured there will be plenty of wide open space (with conveniently placed lines) to house your set of wheels.
Parking is available across the street from Falcons HQ at the Hog Mountain Sports Complex.
That's 4450 Falcon Parkway.
Now, training camp is at 4400 Falcon Parkway, so if you can't find 4450 Falcon Parkway, you probably need to go home and go back to bed.
Don't bring your guns. I know Falcons fans are all just raring to have a gun party at training camp, but I'm gonna have to ask you to postpone that until further notice.
Medical personnel will be available an hour prior to - and 30 minutes after - training camp in case it's needed for any reason. There is covered seating available on "the hill" (I don't know what this looks like) because it tends to get a little warm in Georgia in the summer.
Shirts and shoes are necessary. Pants aren't, though, so you don't have to wear those. (Just kidding, please wear pants to training camp)
No video recording allowed. You can take pictures (No flash!) but no video. We can't have those stinkin' Saints sending spies to our training camp and recording video of our plays.
The Falcons will have a gear tent and a concession stand for all your needs.
Lastly, there's no ATM on site. Bring cash beforehand.
If I missed anything important, here's a link to the TC FAQ, and here's a link to the fan guidelines for training camp, also found in the "Don't bring your guns" Captain Obvious statement.
If you need any more information in this post, say so in the comments. I'll try and find it out for you!