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Jamaal Anderson's Magical Journey To Versatility

After you've worked in the journalism field long enough, you begin to understand what certain things mean. For example, a hearty "I'm not going to comment on that" means "go fornicate with yourself, you maternal fornicator." Also, when someone tells you they're going to expand the role of an employee or give him additional responsibility, it either means they weren't good at that one specific task or they are getting screwed because nobody else is there to fill the gap.

With that in mind, judge line coach Ray Hamilton's comments about Jamaal Anderson for yourself:

"If we can find other fast guys, good pass rushers, then we could move him," Hamilton said of Anderson. "We could use him as a first- and second-down defensive end and on third down move him inside where he could be like [Jacksonville's Stroud and Henderson] in there, beating guards upfield and batting balls down."

Okay, first of all...this is complete nonsense. Jamaal Anderson weighs all of 278 pounds. Even if he takes a huge leap forward this year--which is well within the realm of possibility--he's not going to suddenly turn into Marcus Friggin' Stroud. Unless the team thinks Kroy Biermann is going to develop into a fantastic pass rushing end on third downs, the team is going to put one of the smallest defensive lines in football out there every time it's 3rd and 4. I like versatile linemen, but I'm going to need to see Anderson actually play at defensive tackle and do well before I get all warm and fuzzy about this.

The theme for the year does seem to be versatility, with Steve Wyche stressing that anyone could play anywhere in any scheme at any time. I think that's a fantastic thing to do when you have the right personnel, but I'm afraid that we're trying to fit square pegs into round holes in Falconland. We have a lot of defensive linemen who aren't fast enough to move out to end, and we have a lot of ends who aren't big enough to move into tackle. It'll be interesting to see how this all works out, but I'm not holding my breath.