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Even Madden Dislikes Us

Hear ye, hear ye. Madden's coming out soon, and if you're not getting the Wii version...then you don't like fun. 2007 didn't translate well with the controls, but I'm confident with another year I'll be gunning passes with a casual flick of my wrist. Even if it doesn't work well, I'm not paying for an 360 or a PS3 until the prices come down, so Sony and Microsoft can kiss my ass.

But that's not why I'm here. I wanted to give you all a look at the Madden ratings for our beloved Atlanta Falcons, so you can all see just how big a piss EA Sports is taking on most of our roster. A lot of it is justified, but I'm going to comment anyways because hey, everyone likes being outraged. Here we go:

QB Mike Vick 90 Will he even play?
QB Joey Harrington 76
QB D.J. Shockley 68

FB Ovie Mughelli 91
HB Warrick Dunn 88
HB Jerious Norwood 83 Time will prove this should be higher, I think.
HB Jamal Robertson 67 Just got cut today. Oops.

WR Joe Horn 87 I don't think Joe Horn's that good anymore. I mean, yeah, I hope so. But I don't think so.
WR Michael Jenkins 77 Ouch.
WR Laurent Robinson 74
WR Brian Finneran 73 That's a painful memory.
WR Roddy White 71 Double ouch. I actually think that's a bit unfair, considering Roddy's potential.
WR Fred Gibson 68 Cut.
WR Adam Jennings 65

TE Alge Crumpler 94
TE Dwayne Blakely 71
TE Martrez Milner 67

RG Kynan Forney 92
RT Todd Weiner 91
C Todd McClure 89
LT Wayne Gandy 88 This line is awesome in Madden World. Of course, real life Wayne Gandy is not in Madden World.
LG Justin Blalock 80
RB Tyson Clabo 78
LT Leander Jordan 76
LG Toniu Fonoti 75 Cut.
C Dough Datish 72 Injured reserve.
LT Frank Omiyale 71
RT Quinn Ojinnaka 71
LG P.J. Alexander 69 Technically a center now.

RE John Abraham 93
DT Rod Coleman 92
DT Grady Jackson 81
LE Jamaal Anderson 80
RE Paul Carrington 74
DT Jonathan Babineaux 70 Way too low.
LE Chauncey Davis 70 Lower than Paul Carrington? You've gotta be kidding me.
RE Josh Mallard 68

MLB Keith Brooking 92
LOLB Michael Boley 82 Mike, you should kill whoever programmed your stats. You are at least an 86 if not higher. It's bad enough that you're underrated on the field, but in Madden? Seriously, man. If you want to go bust up some EA guys, I'll ride shotgun. I'm not even joking.
ROLB Demorrio Williams 82
ROLB Stephen Nicholas 68
MLB Jordan Beck 65
LOLB Marcus Wilkins 63

CB DeAngelo Hall 94
CB Lewis Sanders 80
CB Chris Houston 80
CB David Irons 72
CB Allen Rossum 64 More like 46.

SS Lawyer Milloy 88
FS Jimmy Williams 80
FS Chris Crocker 77
SS Omare Lowe 61 Cut, I believe.

K Billy Cundiff 78
P Michael Koenen 82 Should be a couple points higher.

Express your outrage or support for the rankings in the comments, and then go check out Superfan's cartoon in the diaries section.