If you're not interested in an angry rant about something that has nothing to do with the Falcons or football, I won't be offended if you just skip past this. If you want to see why I'm up in arms, keep going. We'll return to our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow.

If you're not a Phillies fan or a Pennsylvania resident, you may be blisfully unaware of Bill Conlin's existence. Being neither of those things, I too didn't know much about him. After I read this happy little post, I wished I never had. If you don't want to read the entire back and forth, here's what Conlin allegedly ended on:

That Conlin himself is clearly being pretentious is beside the point. As is the weird and archaic comparison to pamphleteers and MacBeth. As is the fact that a professional journalist should not be responding to e-mails like a complete jerk. No, I think all of you probably saw the real issue in the first sentence.

He said the good thing about Hitler was that he would've killed all bloggers.

This is one of the most insensitive and downright awful things I've ever seen from a sportswriter, a group not necessarily known for their tact. It's such a terrible "joke" that I would be tempted to laugh if I wasn't so angry about it. Seriously, the dude's implying that killing all bloggers would be pretty sweet...and managing to draw a genocide against millions of people into it for no good reason.

What the hell did a blogger ever do to you, Bill? What's wrong with people carving our their own little niches in the world to put their opinions out there? Seems to me that's what you're doing, except that you get paid and write incredibly offensive things when asked simple questions. Substitute any other word for bloggers and I guarantee people would be knocking the door down to have this clown fired. As it is, odds are pretty good he'll get off with a short suspension from writing, an insincere apology and the peoples' tendencies to forget.

Understand, I'm not advocating a guy get fired for one thing, especially what amounts to one of the worst jokes of all time. I am saying that his bosses have to look into this and decide on a punishment, hopefully one that makes Bill Conlin think twice about talking about wiping a group of people who have literally never done anything to him off the face of the planet.

For my part, I invite you to follow through on your bitterness by having nothing to do with the world of blogging. If you don't like us, Bill Conlin, please don't read us or open your mouth about us ever again. You might also want to avoid Hitler references in the future, as those don't tend to win you any friends from the millions upon millions of sensible human beings who are going to be repulsed when they read what you wrote. It just ends up making everyone involved feel a little dirty.

For my part, I intend to forget you very quickly.

Update [2007-11-24 10:49:28 by Dave the Falconer]: I want to note that I don't think Conlin is anti-Semitic because of this. I also happen to think Coughlin/Saban are idiots for bringing historic tragedies in a simple debate about sports. It demonstrates a lack of awareness of the world that I think is more alarming than anything else. As already noted, I don't think Conlin should get canned for this. Ideally, he'd take a second to consider why he dislikes bloggers so much and change that view. That would be better to me than an apology or punishment for him.

If anyone's curious, CrashBurnAlley's posting of the e-mails was within his legal rights. Was it unethical or at least uncool? Depends on how you tackle it. I will assure you guys that whatever my feelings on Conlin, my policy is to not publish e-mails unless I get permission/ am asked to.

Thoughts?

Hear me out.

I recognize that for any Patriots fans who read this, the title of this post is going to seem deliberately inflammatory. I also realize I'm opening myself up to a million shots about how jealous I am because my team sucks, or how I dwell on the cheating scandal, or how my failure to comply with Patriot Law is going to lead to me getting my ass kicked by a robot version of Richard Seymour. I'd like to assure all of you that this is not the case.

I'm angry because they keep running up the goddamn score, plain and simple. I've tolerated it all year long because the Patriots are so good (and make no mistake, they are that good) that you just had to shake your head. It was annoying, it was unnecessary, but there have been other good teams who have gotten carried away in their eagerness to bury an inferior team. With the Falcons playing every week, it was hard to get up in arms about the Pats. But this week was a bye, of course, and now I have to say my piece.

When Tom Brady stays in the game until it's 45-0 in the fourth quarter, it's more than a little obvious what's going on. I don't want to hear excuses from Patriots fans, either: what if Brady gets hurt there? All of a sudden things aren't quite so funny in New England, are they? And if the team is "proving" to the NFL that it can win despite the tape, well...we already knew they were good. Great, in fact. I don't think the Washington Redskins deserved to beat like a pinata with a battle axe. And I find it more than a little tiring to hear the usual "we can still get better" bullshit from Brady and Belicheck. Or is that the point? Rubbing some more salt in the wound?

This is not to disparage New England fans, my able batterymate at Pats Pulpit included. I think there's a lot of teams out there who would kill for the kind of success the Patriots have enjoyed, and a lot more fans who would probably kill multiple times for that. It's just really discouraging to see an organization that really has always played the game the right way and had great team success suddenly turn to petty revenge, and it's even sadder to me to hear so many people defend it. I hope that the Patriots get this out of their systems and go back to whupping teams instead of intentionally embarassing them.

It's the least they could do.

Imagine, for a moment, that you buy a bad car. You have plenty of money but you're looking for something you can get by on. You don't expect too much from it; it would be nice if you could get from Point A to Point B with it. So you sign the dotted line, slap a bumper sticker on the back and drive that baby home.

But you don't make it home, because the damn car explodes at the end of your driveway.

I think you see where I'm going with this. The Falcons tantalize us by bumbling and stumbling to the finish line every single game. It's like a Three Stooges sketch every damn week, and it ends predictably when the Falcons agonizingly screw it up and barely lose. It's deeply frustrating to lose games like that; at least when we're getting blown out by the Giants, we can take some solace in the fact that we're playing like the bad team we are. When they barely lose to the Saints, however, I can't shake this feeling that our beloved Falcons actually might've been good enough to win it.

The fact that they're sitting at 1-6 right now should eliminate that line of thinking. I should look at what's passing for play calling on this team and pack it in for last year, and the intelligent part of me is busy trying to do that right now. But I still talk myself into it. I think about how well Leftwich did and how Harrington showed little signs of improvement and the defense was still playing reasonably well and aw screw it I want to go play in traffic.

I also came away from the Saints game today convinced that the coaching staff is single-handedly sabotaging the offense. There is no longer any excuse for continually allowing Warrick Dunn to go out there and embarass himself when Norwood quite simply is a better runner than him at this stage. I don't give a damn if he can't pick up a blitz as well as Dunn, because it's not like Dunn is out there blocking like Ovie Mughelli on every play. It's inexcusable to sacrifice the good of the team because you're ridiculously stubborn, and I'm calling Pet Rhino out for it. I want to hear a reasonable explanation for this that isn't "Norwood can't pick up a blitz" or "Dunn is a veteran, so his two yards per carry are worth more than Norwood's five."

And while we're on the subject, with one final drive to try to win the game you don't A) throw passes into the flat to your previously mentioned veteran running back and B) punt. Seriously, this season wasn't already careening down Lost Cause Hill at 400 miles an hour upside down? What possible purpose is there to sending the message that you don't even care enough to try to win the game? It makes me want to hide in a ditch.

So the challenge I'm putting out to the coaching staff is this: no more Saints game. Do the right thing for the team and go for broke if you're down, because the conservative gameplan is killing us. If the defense is on the field so much they can barely hold a lead anymore, that's because we have no running game. Try out Norwood, hell, try out Pinner. They can't--and I mean this with all due respect--do any worse than Dunn. And if Harrington is going to pass all day, figure out a way for him to get the ball downfield consistently, especially when we really need to move. Play to win the game with the personnel you have, because at this point in the season we have nothing to lose.

Please.

There are so many angles to tackle here that I don't think I can get them all in one post. For now we'll start with the overview of a very ugly loss; runningback and I shared our mutual disgust and near-coronaries in the open thread already, but there's so much more to say. None of it is good.

Let's start with the horrible playcalling. You can question whether or not Alge Crumpler should've taken Petrino to the court of public opinion, but you can't deny he has a valid point. The Falcons didn't run when they should've and they refused to go downfield despite Harrington's success doing exactly that the last two weeks. Somehow the team decided that the Titans' average secondary was so fearsome that they couldn't be challenged; the one time Harrington did he had an interception returned for a touchdown. The most frustrating sequence of the entire game involved supposed savior Byron Leftwich practically falling down on a pitch to Warrick Dunn that never should've happened in the first place. With four goddamn downs to score from the 1 yard line, you absolutely do not attempt a pitch to the outside. Instead, you hand the ball to Dunn, Mughelli or Pinner and have them go right up the middle until they punch it in. Maybe you even try for the surprise pass in the endzone. With the tie within reach, every coach except Norv Turner knows you don't screw around.

Yet here I am, bitterly recalling a game we should have won. I don't want to take too much away from the Titans, who won thanks to some solid defense and some heroics from Vince Young. You know what, though?

The Falcons should have won that game. The Artose Pinner rumble on the fake punt was inspired lunacy, Norwood brought the Falcons within easy striking distance on a beautiful return, and the Falcons got turnover after turnover with ease. The defense and special teams, in short, did more than enough to pull out a victory. The offense quite simply let them down in a disgustingly spectacular fashion.

Had this post been on Monday, I likely would've been a lot angrier. With a day and the loss of Internet use to settle me down, I'd rather look at the possible solutions to the general offensive malaise we saw on Sunday. What can cure what ails the Falcons?

1. Let the defense play on both sides of the ball. They can't possibly do any worse, and more than likely the running game would be a lot more effective. I would not advocate allowing the offense even attempt to play D, though.

2. Develop the @*#&@#ing running game. When the passing game fails, no matter what the reason, the ground game should be there to pick up the slack. That has not been the case at all thus far. We were spoiled the last several years with a competent rushing attack that was insanely effective and picked up the slack for Vick's misfirings. If Warrick Dunn is right and the problems this ground game is having aren't due to him simply being old, then the offensive line needs to be whipped into shape post haste and Petrino and Hue Jackson have to make some better calls. Right now would help.

3. Call a better game. This links up to the last one, of course, but I'm focusing on the passing game here. There's no reason for the Falcons to be calling pass plays that only get them two yards at a time. The whole point of having Joey Harrington throw the ball is that he can move us anywhere from five to seventy five yards at a time; if we want two yards, we can always just put it in the hands of the running game. I'm sick and tired of being conservative, and now that we're a 1-4 team there's absolutely no use in playing it safe. Against a team with a suspect secondary like the Giants, the Falcons had better start airing it out early and often.

With the crap this team has gone through so far, we might as well go down in a burst of glory.

Just look at this:

Teams      Total      W/L
Patriots 1.32      3-0
Colts     2.21      3-0
Steelers 3.47      3-0
Cowboys 3.95      3-0
Packers 5.37      3-0
Ravens     8.53      2-1
Seahawks 8.89      2-1
Broncos 8.95      2-1
Chargers 11.42      1-2
Titans     12.53      2-1
Jaguars 12.58      2-1
Texans     12.58      2-1
49ers     13.00      2-1
Buccaneers 14.05 2-1
Panthers 14.16      2-1
Bears     14.53      1-2
Redskins 15.58      2-1
Eagles     15.95      1-2
Bengals 16.68      1-2
Lions     17.53      2-1
Cardinals 21.63  1-2
Jets     22.05      1-2
Giants     24.05      1-2
Vikings 24.84      1-2
Saints     25.32      0-3
Raiders 25.95      1-2
Browns     26.32      1-2
Chiefs     26.47      1-2
Rams     28.11      0-3
Dolphins 28.58      0-3
Bills     30.21      0-3
Falcons 31.21      0-3

Ignore the fact that my erstwhile batterymates at SBNation have once again ranked the Falcons last. Pretty much everyone has done that, and I can't really disagree until they get a win. The prevailing tide of opinion only gets worse with each DeAngelo Hall tirade or whatever batshit fiasco goes terribly wrong next.

No, I'm referring to the numbers. You'll note that this week we are ranked in last with an average rating of 31.21. What was it last week, you ask?

30.94.

So, bear with me while I use the dark arts of logic. The Falcons, who were unquestionably a horrible team in the first two weeks, barely lost to the Panthers due to a series of penalties. Meanwhile, every facet of the team was better than the weeks before. Everyone with rudimentary reading skills, a pair of eyes and ears, or the ability to poke a computer with a stick can tell that. My fellow bloggers are all perfectly capable of this (except for Mile High Report's SportsGuru, who has an eyepatch). They're smart, they know their stuff, and they vote very much according to their own thoughts.

So what the hell? How did the Falcons actually plunge down almost half a point after that performance? I'm deeply confused. Was this the nature of averages working against them? Did more people actually make the decision to move them down after a good performance? And naturally, the Panthers moved up two whole points from an average ranking of 16 to 14 despite a narrow win over the supposed worst team in football. If the Falcons are really that godawful, then the Panthers probably shouldn't have gone anywhere.

This is not to demean our power rankings, which are put together by the talented Fooch of Niners Nation and are voted on by 30 capable, intelligent bloggers and myself. I just can't help but wonder what kind of potent mixture of gin and glue sniffing led to this particular Falcons ranking. It might be because we, um, still aren't very good, but I don't know. I'm not a doctor.

Leave your opinions in the comments, especially if you put the Falcons last in your rankings.

Take a look at the headlines on the AJC's site today and feast on the litany of miseries. Everything from "Harrington feels heat" to "Sanders targeted, burned" awaits you, and it's not hard to understand why. That was a terrible game, and there's no way to avoid the inevitable fact about this team. A fact that no amount of pining for Vick or Leftwich or Bartkowski can rescue us from. A fact so simple and so devastating....

The Atlanta Falcons absolutely suck right now.

I guess I should start by saying that Joey Harrington actually looked decent again. No interceptions, and if he was guilty of anything it was holding on to the ball too long. That's where the good news ends, unfortunately. Harrington was harassed, sacked and generally treated like crap all day as the offensive line took a giant dump on the field. The shift in coaching philosophy is the only reasonable explanation for a line that was very good last year and has suddenly become goddamn awful. If this keeps up, Harrington would be on pace to be sacked 100 times this year. That wouldn't actually happen, though, because the poor bastard would probably be dead by the time he hit 70 or 80. Petrino's vaunted offense is doomed to fail if the team can't get even an ounce of blocking up front.

Make no mistake, it has to be the line. The receivers were already suspect, but when a running game that features two talented backs suddenly stops working, it's instructive to look at why it's happening. From what I've seen it's 75% or more due to inept blocking, missed assignments or holes not opening up. It's still a two game sample, but I don't know how the Falcons can possibly succeed on offense if they can't block a living soul.

The margin for error in this game was even smaller than the Vikings game, which didn't help. The Jaguars have an active defensive front with a lot of power and just made the line look like a bunch of clowns. That's always a great feeling. Harrington did manage to keep the ball out of the clutches of Rashean Mathis, but the team still just stalled out. When you only have one drive over 60 yards, you're setting yourself up to suck.

The defense acquitted themselves fairly well, showing the kind of bend but don't break philosophy that normally works. Any time you hold a team to 13 points you've done a reasonable job, even when that team happens to be the equally inept David Garrard. It helped that Babineaux and Grady Jackson piled up three sacks in the middle and pressured Garrard enough to make him less than totally effective. Unfortunately he was still good enough to lead his team to victory, but that really didn't take much.

It would've taken more if Matt Prater hadn't screwed up so badly. It's not like I want the guy to fail, but if he's going to continue to do so I'd really like it to be somewhere else. Missing field goals under 30 yards is the one thing a kicker can do to make me abandon all hope, and Prater did his damndest to do so. If the Falcons don't have another kicker by gametime next weekend, I'd be amazed. He's just run out of chances in my mind.

So there you have it. With any luck this will be the worst of it, but I'm not convinced.

That game reminded me of a fistfight between two really old dudes. Sure, it's a fight, but they're swinging so slowly and so pitifully that it's both boring and embarassing to watch. Eventually one of them is going to get knocked down, but by that point you're filing for the exits. I guess what I'm trying to say is that that game totally sucked.

I'm definitely most disappointed that I have to criticize the two worst parts of the team from last year all over again. For all the good things I saw from Petrino throughout the preseason, I did question some of his personnel moves. The most glaring one today turned out to be pounding Warrick Dunn over and over again into one of the league's better run defenses. Norwood had 33 yards on only five carries, which suggested to me that he could've possibly been more effective. It certainly wouldn't have killed Petrino to try it; if he had, I certainly would've been less inclined to blame him regardless of the outcome. I also wasn't a big fan of Petrino's/Hue Jackson's play calling for Harrington. He doesn't have a great deep arm by any stretch of the imagination, but even when the team was down by a lot they kept trying to dink and dunk their way up the field.

Speaking of Harrington, he's not getting a free pass. His first interception to Kevin Williams smacked of desperation and poor decision making, and the second one to Antoine Winfield was only a bit more defensible. Overall I thought he was better than his final stat line, but he's going to have to air it out more often to have a chance of carrying this team. He also really needs receivers who aren't going to drop the ball, a problem I kinda hoped the team would've solved after being chronically embarassed by it last year. White had his moments, but once again he and Jenkins didn't impress me with stellar route running. Jenkins  had one drop in particular that made me want to twelve gauge the screen.

Special teams and defense are more defensible. Sometimes you just have to tip your hat to a talented running back, and Adrian Peterson gave a lot of Vikings fans a glimpse of hope for the future. The kid has a ton of talent. Given that and the way they shut down the Vikings most of the day through the air, I'll give the defense a passing grade for this one, but they're going to have to step up to keep Maurice Jones-Drew and David Garrard from scrambling all over them. I think Brooking and Boley in particular looked pretty smooth out there, and we'll need them to be if the Falcons are going to do damn near anything this year.

Speaking of doing damn near anything, why Matt Prater? I don't want to come down too hard on the kid given his jitters and the fact that he later made a 45 yarder, but that first miss wasn't even close. I'm still puzzled with Petrino's decision making; he stuck with veterans in some places (Dunn, Lewis Sanders) and then promptly dumped Billy Cundiff based on a tiny span of time with Prater. Maybe they see something in the kid I don't, and I sure would welcome him if he can become that rare breed of consistent kicker than can hang around for a while. I just didn't see it tonight.

There's not much for good news here, but Laurent Robinson really does look like the real deal. In a game where nobody stood out, he flashed the kind of speed and awareness that are increasingly making him intriguing to me. If Jenkins and White can't put it together consistently, don't be surprised if L-Rob is sitting a lot higher on the depth chart by the end of the season. It was also really nice to see Crumpler in there being the steady veteran force he always is, especially because I was worried he would be limited by his injuries. I also have to applaud DeAngelo Hall, who had a really nice pick and generally played well. But that's really about all the praise I can muster.

If this sounds more muted than my usual criticism, it's probably because this is still just the first game. It's hard for me to give up on the season after one pathetic display, even if it was the kind that makes you want to dive into the shallow end of the pool. The whole team still has a couple rolls to get out of jail (I love Monopoly) before I start really rolling on them. I hope they take advantage of them.

Game MVP: Adrian Peterson; for us I guess it would be DeAngelo Hall.
Theme Song: Truth Is- Brother Ali
One Thing To Take Away: This team is clearly not ready to make a lot of noise just yet.
Next Week: The Falcons run into a potent defense and mobile offense in the Jaguars. That doesn't sound good on paper.
Final Word: Put your pitchforks and torches down, ladies and gents. It's not time to panic yet, but there's plenty of reason to be concerned. Pray that this was a fluke.

The Falcons cut Jordan Beck, a move I don't agree with. I will say that I can at least see the impetus behind it with Tony Taylor sewing up the backup spot, but depth at linebacker never hurts. I can disagree with the coaching staff, but I'm not going to get my red and black pantaloons in a bunch over it. At least the Falcons made some good depth moves by signing a defensive tackle and a guard with French names. Those are the types of moves that only savvy contenders make.

But it can't be all sunshine at Flowery Branch, because the Falcons had to go and make a move that I find so exceedingly dumb that it defies explanation. I'm talking about the release of Jason Snelling and signing of Artose Pinner. Normally I'd say something like "I don't know where to begin" before launching into this, but in this case I know exactly where I stand.

It is an indefensibly archaic idea, this having veterans as backups. Artose Pinner has never once proven himself to be a capable back at the NFL level. He's a decent third option, and that's fine. Up until now he just got his paycheck, rushed for maybe 200 yards a season and in no way interfered with my life. But then Pet Rhino flew in the face of logic by releasing Snelling and bringing in Pinner. Again, Pinner is a capable enough third back--but it looked like Snelling could be, too. He's also younger, cheaper and dabbled in fullback work. Snelling also was the team's only really effective rusher in the preseason and had survived the first set of cuts. He looked like a look to be the third back, and he certainly won me over by showing way more speed and power than any fan had any right to expect from him. And for all that, he gets cut for a veteran with absolutely zero potential.

I realize it's likely he'll come back to the practice squad, but I don't really think that's good enough. Snelling earned a shot with the Falcons, and they could've easily signed somebody like Pinner later on in the season. This is the kind of move that makes me wonder if there wasn't something else going on behind the scenes that made this happen. I can't imagine that from a football perspective Jason Snelling is any less capable than Artose Pinner of soaking up a few goal line carries and occasionally lurching forward for four yards.