As Detective Lester Freamon would say, our middle linebacker is natural poe-lice. Lofton's jersey number is 5-0, and his job is to chase people around and knock them to the ground: how'd we miss coming up with this one? EA Sports was right -- Simba is a genius.

Spoon, via Jay Adams: "You can't run from The Police."

You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to Photoshop Officer Lofton onto a poster for a movie about walking away from explosions that co-stars Kroy Biermann. Anything you Photoshop can and will be rec'd to infinity in a comment section of this blog.

Spoon, we need you to join us. We promise not to take up too much of your Twitter time.