The Top 10 Players the Falcons Are Guaranteed to Never, Ever Sign (Including Terrell Owens)
by Jason Kirk on May 27, 2010 7:45 AM EDT
in Editorial
Email
PrintThere's an issue we feel must be cleared up. Every offseason it slouches towards Atlanta, a dead horse begging to be beaten back to life. A horse so dead the Four Horsemen won't go near it, even though one of them is named Death. Yes. The Terrell Owens dead horse.
Should the Falcons sign middle-aged Terrell Owens in the year 2010, even though it seemed like a bad idea in 2009, 2008, 2007, and 2006? This discussion is up past its bedtime. Also, we'll break down ten other players the Falcons absolutely have no interest in, despite annual summer rumblings by hundreds of bored fans on message boards, talk radio, blogs, and the city newspaper. If you've found yourself caught up in such a frenzy, Robin Williams empathizes. Even the most intelligent of football fans, Falcoholics themselves, have found themselves caught up in the Owens Madness from time to time.
1. Terrell Owens: Remember how we let Lawyer Milloy go for being a step too slow? The Public Defender was 35 at the time. Owens is 36. Last year, only one receiver over 35 ranked in the top 50 in receiving yardage (Derrick Mason). Face it: Terrell's not just fading. He's faded. Six months ago in Atlanta, Terrell wasn't even the best Owens within his own ten-foot radius, racking up 35 yards on 5 touches.
Christopher Owens: world's best Owens. via s3.hubimg.com
2. Bill Bradley: Bradley is satisfied in his current capacity as secondary coach of the UFL's Florida Tuskers.
3. Terrell Owens: When's the last time you heard a Falcon whining to the press? When's the last time ownership and the coaching staff caved to the every whim of one player? I'd say it's been since the DeAngelo Hall and Michael Vick days. How'd that turn out?
4. Terrell Owens: Arthur Blank has painstakingly demonstrated, in word and deed, what's expected of the modern Falcon. Be community-minded, studious, and responsible. These terms capture what we love most about Jason Snelling, Warrick Dunn, Kroy Biermann, Chauncey Davis, and so on. Which of these three adjectives do you think best describes Terrell Owens?
5. Terrell Owens: He kicked off a Mean Girls feud with Tony Romo due to Romo's supposed preference for Jason Witten. How much would TO love being the (at absolute best) fourth wheel in Atlanta behind Roddy White, Tony Gonzalez, and Michael Turner?
6. Terrell Owens: Did you know he's had exactly three 100-yard games since December 2007? That's 35 games. 35 -- hey, that sounds like his age, except it's not quite as big a number. Again, look at the effort on this play. He had several seconds to position himself for this lob, and this is the spot to which he chose to jog?
7. Terrell Owens: Most people like him.
8. Wayne Rooney: While he's a tremendous athlete, he plays a different sport.
9. Terrell Owens: Chan Gailey doesn't want TO for one more year. Chan Gailey started Reggie Ball for four years. Thus, simple mathematics prove Terrell Owens is at least four times worse than Reggie Ball.
Not even Buffalo wants him. via jonwbecker.files.wordpress.com
10. Terrell Owens: He once publicly questioned Jeff Garcia's heterosexuality in a negative manner. This crosses the line from bad teammate to bad person -- if Garcia disclosed private information to a teammate in confidence, then TO's an asshole. If TO just made it up to equate homosexuality with femininity and femininity with weakness, then he's an out and proud Xbox Live homophobe. How would that fly around here? What, you think the team that plays in America's gayest city doesn't have gay fans? And while we're aware Matt Ryan is a stone cold ladyslayer, it's best if we don't give a fifth-grader like Owens too close a look at Ice's confident stride.
Regardless of orientation, nobody likes being touched like this by Terrell Owens. via i.a.cnn.net
11. Terrell Owens: Owens is 36 years old. This would make him the oldest player on our team. Comrade has signed two older veterans in the past three years -- Mike Peterson and Tony Gonzalez (and they were only 32 at the time). Peterson already knew Mike Smith's defense inside and out, plays hard, and has served as a mentor to every Falcon linebacker from Stephen Nicholas to Sean Weatherspoon. Tony Gonzalez is the best tight end ever and has shown no signs of falling off -- we would not have broken The Streak without him, period. (A) player-coach or (B) productive Hall-of-Famer: based on what we've learned, one of these two criteria must be met for Comrade to sign an older player. Which of these two things best describes Terrell Owens' track record? A or B?
We'll take exactly one of these 30+ players. via alt.coxnewsweb.com
Next item for discussion: should the Falcons think about signing Tim Biakabutuka?
59 comments
|
1 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
this one goes to 11
Just the fact that you made the top 10 list have an 11th spot is pretty funny.
by HeyJenkinsNiceHands on May 27, 2010 8:17 AM EDT reply actions
Yes
Soon this list will expand to 24
Longest Atlanta Falcons winning-seasons streak: 2008 - current
The Falcoholic · Blog · Twitter
you said T.O. 9 times
and since when would Wayne Rooney want to play American football when he’s one of the best soccer players in the world
...in dixie land i'll take my stand to root for Atlanta
Forget T.O.
I wanted PacMan Jones. Stupid Bengals.
Watching Bobby Cox pick boogers since 1995
by a hooter's baby on May 27, 2010 8:29 AM EDT reply actions
And I mean Jeff Garcia
had this going for him at the time… Gay? I think not. This is the coolest story no one has ever heard.
When you get a Playmate of the Year fighting tooth and nail for you, you aint gay.
" No, I think I'll sit in the balcony " - Abe Lincoln
Ummm ok?
I disagree but im not the argueing type. One year two million? Matter of fact just bring him in for one camp meeting. It wouldnt hurt.
by LORD91 on May 27, 2010 9:20 AM EDT via mobile reply actions
I disagree but im not the argueing type
No one is asking you to argue. Just prove your point. There’s absolutely no reason to think he could help this team given our current roster. And …
It wouldnt hurt.
Wrong. It could hurt. Bad. Ask San Francisco, Philly, and Dallas.
What i meant was
I didn’t want my words to fall upon deaf ears. I can say “I want T.O.” All day but i know i am going to get a ton of hell no’s. Once again i say it wouldn’t hurt. He has matured(Age and personality) Also what if(God forbid) Harry and Roddy get hurt. Then what? Also i know i am going to hear a ton about this but he can also be a back up if need be. For god sakes Brett farve is 39 or 40 years old and what did he do last year? I’m gonna let you answer this one yourself
I don't think we're talking about the same T.O.
He is ONE year removed from Dallas, and he called out Edwards last year after the NE loss. In week one!
I can say "I want T.O." All day but i know i am going to get a ton of hell no’s. Once again i say it wouldn’t hurt.
That is your proof? It wouldn’t hurt? Even if Harry and/or Roddy get hurt, I’d rather they go re-sign Finn (assuming he gets cut), or Wolfe off the practice squad (assuming he’s there instead of Meier).
Brett Favre is a QB, not a wide receiver. He doesn’t need to be athletic. It’s not analogous whatsoever.
I’m sorry if I’m coming off abrasive, but you’re really not offering up any kind of actual proof, aside from his potential for veteran leadership, which is minimal at best.
Lol.
All i am saying with the whole bret farve thing is that age doesnt make a big difference on people. As for proof even if i gave you a ten page paper of why he is good for the team i would get the same response. So i just decided not to waste my time. All I want is the falcons to get to the superbowl with or without him.
Why do you defend Owens?
Every time a thread with his name pops up you are one of only a few people that want him on the team. Why? Please explain. He sucks as a football player and a person. There are so many other places that 2MM could go that woyuld actually benefit the team, like a better mascot.
by mwalex on May 27, 2010 4:38 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I think he has in the past
I think the argument for Owens is simply, he’s more talented than Jenkins. I don’t agree with that argument at this stage of his career, but I can respect it. It’s all the off-the-field stuff that really makes it a bad decision.
Sign up for a free account today to join the discussion about all things Atlanta Falcons!
I still have hope for Jenkins
Seeing him eclipse the other two cornerbacks to help Roddy out against the 49ers
I don't know if
Owens is more talented than Jenkins. What are the comparative drop rates for the two? Jenkins is pretty high but so is Owens.
Owens talent has NEVER off set the problems he causes for the team he is on.
probably for the reasons you just said.
Maybe some people defend him because other choose to dog him, like thats new
Atlanta will win a championship....someday
I completely endorse this post.
You have opinions. We all do. Some of yours may have to do with the Falcons. Sign up today and share them.
Michael Vick and DeAngelo Hall
Are further down the list than 9 TOs…Wow! You really don’t like TO…I don’t either (and think signing him is a bad idea), but my hatred isn’t that deep…
No hate. I watch non-Falcons football for entertainment, and TO is one of the most entertaining players ever.
Just don’t want him on my team, which is good because it’s not happening.
Longest Atlanta Falcons winning-seasons streak: 2008 - current
The Falcoholic · Blog · Twitter
I actually appreciate the post...
I was guilty of posting a Fan Shot about T.O. a couple of weeks ago. I was new to the site and didn’t realize this discussion had already been addressed (need to do better homework next time).
I read the suggestion on the AJC. That’s why it keeps coming up year after year. People keep rehashing the idea.
I was shocked for I did not even think that the Falcons would ever be remotely interested…I thought someone may have heard something…
I really don’t think he would help us. I would rather give a young guy like Meier a chance…If we HAD to sign someone, what about Lavernaues Coles???? I still say no, but better than T.O.
Yeah... tried to word this post so that nobody who posted recently on the topic would take offense
It’s a long, long offseason, and we all get a little delirious. At this point two years ago, I was pretty much counting the days until Mike Vick’s release from prison — that’s WAY crazier than signing TO.
Longest Atlanta Falcons winning-seasons streak: 2008 - current
The Falcoholic · Blog · Twitter
Ryan Leaf just called and said he wants his title back.
For all time D Bag champ.
Rule #1: Double tap.
by Ball Hawk on May 27, 2010 12:53 PM EDT via mobile reply actions
excuse me sir
but MEH is not a better player than terrell owens. At least I thought that is who that picture is off and Chris Owens.
Life is a garden. Dig it!
by Hardcore Falcon on May 27, 2010 2:43 PM EDT reply actions
my typing sucks yet again.
this should say "that picture is of and NOT Chris Owens.
Life is a garden. Dig it!
by Hardcore Falcon on May 27, 2010 2:44 PM EDT up reply actions
No sir that was #21 not #23
But it’s cool we all have delusions every once and a while. Meaning meh beating TO. Probably not.
Rule #1: Double tap.
by Ball Hawk on May 27, 2010 3:07 PM EDT via mobile up reply actions
yep
I do have those on occasion and I should have known better…
Life is a garden. Dig it!
by Hardcore Falcon on May 28, 2010 7:56 AM EDT up reply actions
Hey
What’s up Falcon Fans!!!
Just a Panther fan looking to talk football. I gotta say this is an awesome post…i bet most falcon fans would have a heart attack if you guys signed owens! The graphic for #3 is hilarious BTW
This year is going to be one heck of a ride! Looking forward to it!!!
by Panther4Life!!! on May 27, 2010 6:18 PM EDT reply actions
How are the Panthers looking for this year?
Are you guys gonna be any good? Are there any particular teams in the division you’re worried about or expect particularly tough games from?
phahahaha
nice! subtle.
Fear does not exist in this dojo, does it? NO, SENSEI! Pain does not exist in this dojo, does it? NO, SENSEI! Defeat does not exist in this dojo, does it? NO SENSEI! - John Creese, Kobra Kai
by DonnyBrasco on May 28, 2010 12:19 AM EDT up reply actions
You know
All of them are going to be tough, especially the two against the Falcons those games always seem to be the most exciting of all the divisional games. And i’d hate for the panthers to lose to the bears because of peppers.
What about you guys?
This year is going to be one heck of a ride! Looking forward to it!!!
by Panther4Life!!! on May 28, 2010 12:29 AM EDT up reply actions
Last year I was worried, this year not so much.
Ravens, 49rs and packers are interesting games. Of course our pesky turd of a little brother the Saints. Carolina games are always fun for me because my family has season tix up there so I go to the Falcons games.
Rule #1: Double tap.
by Ball Hawk on May 28, 2010 9:00 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
Yea
For us, we always either seem to split with the saints or totally OWN them…this year i think we might split again.
You can never count out Drew Brees, I was also looking forward to the Niners game only because my wife is a fan, and i thought they were going to play here in SF(live in Cali). Then i found out the full schedule and got bummed out that it was going to be in Charlotte.
This year is going to be one heck of a ride! Looking forward to it!!!
by Panther4Life!!! on May 28, 2010 11:36 AM EDT up reply actions
im having severe
foot ball withdrawal i need something. I might buy a jersey just to deal god i need some football
Falcons365 has DEEP discounts on Joey Harrington jerseys!
I’m trying to figure out how to change the name and number without it looking too obvious.
How many more days, Lord, must I walk through the wilderness?
Easy
even the screen printed ones have sewn on name plates (unless you buy the K-mart version). you can remove them very easily with cut to the stichting at either corner. I have done it before.
Life is a garden. Dig it!
by Hardcore Falcon on May 28, 2010 2:25 PM EDT up reply actions
patrick crayton
Wants out of dallas. Would anyone like 2 have him??? I damn sure think he could be useful depending on HD’s status
by DEMBIRDZCUZ! on May 28, 2010 10:37 PM EDT via mobile reply actions
If he wants out of Dallas.
It’s because he’s going to be number 4 on their depth chart. So why in the world would he come here to be the exact same thing?
He wants to be a 1 or 2 receiver not 4.
Australian Atlanta Falcons Fan EST 2003
Falcons are my life,
Falcons are my soul,
I watch them through all the strife,
Until they get that Superbowl.
by Grayson on May 29, 2010 1:38 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
'Cause maybe he wouldn't be a 4 here
Crayton could very well compete with and outperform Jenkins. He would be nowhere near 4 on the depth chart in ATL, so that’s why this wouldn’t be as outlandish as it seems.
Not sayin’ it’s happening. Just that it could.
Yeah true.
But I think you have to think of this in terms of our team’s scheme and ideology.
Jenkins is the number 2 guy because he is one of the best run blocking receivers in the game. Now I know that sounds stupid and not all that pretty (no real stats to show his value). But that’s just how it is.
Now I know we all think Jenkins couldn’t catch a cold, but I think he has some value and is relatively consistent if everyone is healthy. He’s a confidence guy and if the team is thriving his potential is thus maximized.
Australian Atlanta Falcons Fan EST 2003
Falcons are my life,
Falcons are my soul,
I watch them through all the strife,
Until they get that Superbowl.
Most overrated receiver in NFL history
I tried to give T.O. a print out of this blog but he kept dropping it.
by thedondo on May 29, 2010 8:50 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
IDK, I don't want him but
He has put up some big numbers he is ahead of Tony G. In receptions. His yards are impressive and he has been an awesome talent. I think if he would have not been so immature throughout his career he would be a top 5 reciever. As it stands he will make top 15.
Rule #1: Double tap.
by Ball Hawk on May 29, 2010 9:06 AM EDT via mobile up reply actions
So is this the end all negative post
about TO coming here?
Atlanta will win a championship....someday
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Certain photos copyright © 2012 by Associated Press or Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Associated Press and Getty Images is strictly prohibited.
