Asking Totally Unqualified People For Draft Advice

In case you weren't aware, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution is the paper of record in Georgia. With its proud history, it stands as a beacon of southern journalism and blah blah blah. That's why, when I open the paper's website to check on Falcon news each day, I know that I will be getting only relevant and hard-hitting content. They will make me proud to be a reporter.

Or they could do this.

I think what's most hilarious about this little exercise is the small sample size. I would love to hear, for example, what Jair Jurrjens thinks about Jake Long. Better yet, ask Yunel Escobar if he thinks the Falcons should aim for safety Tyrell Johnson. Or they could simply praise Escobar for being one of the best players on my fantasy team, which he so totally is.

With that aside, let's see who gets the Falcoholic seal of approval:

Chipper Jones, 3B: I like that Chipper wants Jake Long, but I mark down a frowny face with devil horns at his choice of Matt Ryan to follow. His reasoning for Ryan--that you need a skill position player if Long isn't there--doesn't apply in my mind when you have a pretty fantastic option at defensive tackle available (I'm assuming). Still, the Long for first gives him mad points.
Grade: B

PGA Tour Pro Charles Howell III: You ever been around a sports fan that says something like "yeah, I've been a Falcons fan forever...I can't wait to see what Patrick Kerney does this year" even though Kerney isn't on the team? Howell appears to be the distant cousin of that guy. His suggestion that we trade the pick is welcome, but McFadden is way, way down on my draft board considering we just friggin' signed Michael Turner. Also, I don't recall golf pros playing for the Braves recently. Bad Charles Howell!
Grade: D+

Jeff Francouer, OF: Clarion calls for Glenn Dorsey and Matt Ryan. He gets quality points for Dorsey (slightly less than Chipper for Long), and gets docked for the senseless calls for Matt Ryan. Guy's an amazing player, though.
Grade: B-

Kelly Johnson, 2B: Screw running back and quarterback, Kelly wants offensive or defensive linemen! I'd argue that Chris Long is not really the best option here, but otherwise I find Johnson's thoughts sensible and intelligent. The team is likely to go with one of the two lines, and I can't help but feel that Johnson actually knows that he's talking about. Congratulations, Kelly! You've qualified for a free beer, courtesy of The Falcoholic!
Grade: B+

So Kelly Johnson wins our completely meaningless sweepstakes. Next week: what Atlanta-area nuns think of the Falcon linebacking corps.